"You and I must make pact; we must bring salvation back"

Where there is love, I'll be there....


Yep.
It's time for sappy-Matt again.
But man, I can't help it. I'm in a good mood.... And when I'm in a good mood, I think of love. That's what makes me happy. That's all I really want. Happiness.
And I'm working on it. I'll get it eventually.

Not to say, mind you, that I'm not happy now. Because I am. But I speak of happiness with that one special lady. The one that's gonna look up at me with big bright eyes and wrap her arms around my neck and kiss me so sweetly. It's those little things that I long for in a relationship.

People say "don't sweat the small stuff", but that's all that should be... umm... sweated? That's not a real word, but you get the point. If you'll indulge me, faithful reader, I'll explain myself.

Without the small stuff, one can't have big stuff. Everything starts out as the small stuff. So by paying attention to little details, one has control over how much power they have when they become big things, y'know what I'm saying? Ya dig me?
Maybe it's because I'm obsessive compulsive, but I like to take care of every little detail. Sure, I may be sloppy when it comes to keeping my living area clean at times, but no one's perfect. A messy home doesn't always mean a dirty mind.
In my case, there's nothing to explain my dirty mind.

But I digress...
The little things are what's most important to me. Stealing glances across a table during dinner, holding hands, sneaking kisses at the movies, watching a movie together and sneaking looks to see if that girl is crying during a sad part.
I realize money means something in the grand scheme of things, but money don't mean shit if you're not happy, ya know what I'm saying?
As much as I'd love to say I have someone to hold and to call my lover, my friend, the one who warms my soul with a smile, I don't.
And I don't really know if I'm even ready to start a relationship right now. Maybe I am. I just know it ain't gonna happen in Gander. I've made my mind up about that.


So besides the Jackson 5 putting me in a good mood, Paolo Nutini keeping it up, and the Righteous Brothers putting a spin on things, there's something else that's making sure my spirits are up.

I got a letter from MUN today saying they've recieved my application. I know, I know... you might be thinking that I've said I already said I was accepted... And yeah, I may have given that impression. But I'm thinking positively about this.
There's just one more step to take now, and that's to send the required pieces of information to the registrar's office on Monday.
Why wait so late, Matthew?
Well, I'm waiting on a personal letter of reference from my aunt...

Man, I'm thankful for the mature student clause, I tell ya that. If I were to apply using just my highschool marks, there is NO CHANCE IN HELL (there's my vince mcmahon reference) that I'd get in. I did terrible in high school. It really was high school for me. I can't tell you how many times I got stoned and went into Mr. Soper's english class. I think I was stoned the entire time I read Lord of the Flies.
I really do wish, however, that we could've done Catcher in the Rye. That is one hell of a book, even though it's close on to fifty years old.

Back to MUN. As it's already been said, I'm applying as a mature student. I'm glad I waited so long, because I've got all that partying out of my system. I've seen and done it all as far as getting fucked up goes. I don't need to do it anymore... there's no real need. Getting stoned doesn't really appeal to me, and getting drunk was never an issue.
Sure, I think it's okay to have a joint once in awhile to keep the edge off, or a beer once in awhile to relax. But I'm done with getting fucked up. It's gone out the window like a fart in the wind.

I'm excited about MUN. I'm looking forward to it. It appeals to me. I've put myself in the position of my mother, some thirty-odd years ago, and I think of the dreams, hopes, and aspirations she was filled with. Coming from a small town such as Stephenville Crossing to a huge place like St. John's was a very daunting task; a huge change of life.
How was she to know so many years ago that her son would be doing the same thing? How did she even know she'd have a son?

My oh my, how things tend to change.
I look at where I was ten years ago, and where I am now. Jesus, how things have changed.
It's crazy to think how much things will change in the upcoming ten years... I'll be well into my thirties... And that's frightening.
I may not even have kids.
But I'm gonna be married. That's at least one goal.

And I'm gonna have my education. I'm gonna have a degree.
And I'm gonna be teaching your children high school english.

How scary is that, to know that the minds of your children are going to be in my hands? Not literally, of course. I would never dream of cutting open your kid's head and literally touch his brain. That's nasty.